愛做夢的我～Val

Ok... for everybody's benefit... I applied to the Taipei National University of the Arts, http://www.tnua.edu.tw Department of Theatre Design & Technology : http://design.tnua.edu.tw

I went for a proficiency test in late February at the Tawian Representative office. Basically took a test with English, Maths & Mandarin together in a 2-hr paper. I'm suppose to know the results today, and at this moment...I received a call from the TW Rep Office. I have this bad habit of not picing up calls when I don't know the number. Since the call is gonna be transfered to a voice mail, most of the time I'll wait to see if the caller finds it important to leave me a voice message.

And... I did receive a voice message... my sms shows:
1 new voice message in your mailbox. By number 6278XXXX

At exactly One -thirty in the afternoon, I receive news that I have been accepted intot he University that I applied for!!!!!!!!!!~ ^_^ Fabulous ah.... to think I've been worrying for the past few months... But I fear this is only the beginning ....

Anyway, this is a start .... a means to the end I want... haha ....

Attending the wake of dearest Mrs Ong, here at the Ong's residence at Jalan Pintau. Gone is the physical body of the one whom we love dearly, but what gets left behind I believe that is what's most important. We'll all remember her love, her warmth, her sensitivity.. and so much more.

Tonight's the last night and Voices of Praise Choir am gonna sing 3 of the songs we have performed before at the Wake.

陰/晴

當我從Lunch Box-->一家日本速食便當店裡走出來時.... 忽然想起這是我第二次回到這附近上班。雖然有大概10年之久... 但相同之處就是都是Temporary job/臨工。看著四周的高樓大夏, 回想起之前的自己開始到這裡上班時竟不習慣看著那麼多高樓... 相對的自己顯得好渺小哦... 那時的我要好幾個星期才習慣這些高樓的存在呢。

這午後並不很熱, 是屬於個悠閒的下午但是, 是個我不能享受的下午。走著... 我很清楚, 自己並不屬於這裡。在這快步的都會裡, 我到底該在哪裏? I feel apart yet am not physically apart. 這已不是第一次我有這種感覺了... 重回這裡有種似曾相似感。奇怪的是, 我心理其實很清楚... 我永遠不會屬於這裡... it's something that my heart instinctively knows, just because I feel out of place here. It likens to wearing leather boots to a beach... it just don't go...

我忘了是誰曾經說過有關歸屬感的: 歸屬感 or Sense of belonging 不會來自一棟房子, 一間公司或辦公室, 或一個or某個地方/地點。它也不是一個人, 一群人或一個團體所能給的。相反的, 歸屬感/sense of belonging 來自本身/ comes from within。

有時旅遊到某個地方, 會莫名奇妙地感覺和這裡的每一景一物有股莫名的融合感, it just felt as if you belong here somehow... It's not what things or people can give you but what you yourself feel. If you felt that you belonged, you can be anywhere in the world and still feel the same. Maybe it's just me...

I often find myself detaching away from people, at times to observe. Looking at the world from a different point of view, not immersing myself into the situation. Times I find myself musing that there seem not to be a place where I truly belong to. Funny how the default reacion is to refer to a "place" to belong to. Guess this is what education and literature does to ya... as it kinda shapes our reaction and how we see stuff.

But one thing stays true all these years... 那麼多年前到現在... 我還是不屬於這裡...

雨天

在這已經工作了將近一個月了... 算算看今天是第21天啦 ... 嗯，要扣掉2天的病假還有1天不適待在家睡.... 我真正工作了18天... 哈哈哈~~ ^_^

= = 說真的，我還是不習慣早起來上班...雖然是份臨工... 唉... 總是想賴在床上多睡一點... 呵呵...
下雨天啊... 好想鑽進暖暖的被窩裡啊.... 哈哈...

喝著熱飲，仿佛有種幸福的感覺。暖著冰冷的手指，全身因為暖氣而顫抖了一下.... 呵呵... 這算不算是另類的幸福感啊... 哈哈哈....

期待成績放榜日!!!!!!!!!! 30號就是啦... 祝我好運啊....

Well.... not many know that I sing. I do and have been part of Church Choir and in recent years joined the Voices of Praise Choir, that was originally formed because of the funding project for Sengkang Methodist Church. Though I haven't been singing since the last concert last June where we went to Melbourne, as part of a fund-raising project in a local church.

It's June again and Voices of Praise Choir (VOP for short), are back in another round of concerts. This time trekking through to our neighbour Malaysia, singing in Ipoh and Penang. Whilst back last week, there's also another round in Singapore, which is going on right now. I'm not sure about the dates though but last night there was one. My memory ain't that good since I took a break from singing.

Ok, why am I saying all this? Actually it's because of the Choir member, Mrs Ong passed away on Sunday afternnon. She was with us since the beginning and is like a mum to all of us. Well, I'm one of the young ones anyway, in truth I am shocked when I heard my mum announce that when she came back after the concert, wearing her concert garb of maroon dress. Mrs Ong was a Choir member and also in the committee. She has been taking care of giving out our song sheets, making sure we all have a copy; our attire, women with dress and men with their white shirts etc.

Nothing can express the sadness and it was all so sudden! Mum mentioned that Mr. Ong and his sons find it hard to believe that their beloved has left them. Going down to the wake on Wednesday night, I am at a loss for words but guess just by being there makes all the difference.

晴天

我今早又上班了... 有點累因為昨天也是上早班。說實在的... 接待處 (Reception) 的瑣碎事算起來還真多啊... 一旦忙起來還真忙，閑的時候可真有空拍蒼蠅呢.... 呵呵...

早班最煩的差事莫過於“追蹤”報紙的下落了。每早上的例常事務會在會員的不合作下使得本來容易的事顯得煩悶與浮躁。I really dun understand! It's not as if the people there can't afford to pay for a copy of the papers... so why do they then borrow and not return? 我真的想不通!!!!!!!!!! 是stingy嗎？是habit嗎？還是這是所謂的ugly Singaporean?

俗話說的好：有借有還 再借不難。但，有借不還再借可就難咯。做服務業的在怎麼惡劣的情況下還是要保持著笑臉迎人或是個positive attitude可真是個考驗。有時碰到故意刁難的人也不能對他們怎樣，我們不也是在賺他們的錢。唉~~~~ 能怎樣嗎？我想也只能在其中自得其樂或看開點吧 ....